Assertiveness means standing up for yourself. If you’re assertive, you can make sure your opinions and feelings are considered. Being assertive isn’t the same as being aggressive. You can be assertive without being forceful or rude.

Not sure how to do it? Try this:

Practise what you want to say beforehand. Then, stick to it.

During the conversation, keep returning to your prepared lines.

Them: Have a drink.
You: No thanks. I have an early team practice.
Them: Come on just one.
You: Not tonight.
Them: You’re no fun, don’t you want to have fun?
You: I’m not drinking tonight because I have an early team practice.

This approach is particularly useful in:

• Situations where what you want is being ignored.
• Coping with clever or pushy people.
• Situations where you may feel insecure and tempted to give in.

Remember:

• Work out what you want to say beforehand.
• Repeat your reply if you need to and stick to what you have decided.

Being assertive takes practice, so don’t worry if it takes time. Standing up for yourself is never a bad thing. It means you’re looking after yourself. Take pride in this decision.